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Words Of The Latter Rain

Volume 3, Issue 7, July 2010

7/23/2010

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MY LONGING HEART

Ken Nix

Friday, 7/23/2010

“I am the Lord Jesus, your Savior and most tender shepherd. These are words to be placed within the Words of the Latter Rain, and are words to help my people to see the power of a longing heart. This day by the power of the cloud of glory my servant of the latter days shall receive words about a man who knew the power of a longing heart. David, you shall receive his words and you shall see the images described. I tell you of a man named Benjamin who walked in darkness most of his life until he found the power of a longing heart, and then he walked in heavenly light the rest of his days. Benjamin was a thief, and he lived life in the shadows. He met a woman named Rachael and they were wed. He kept from her what he did until the day he was caught and was then sentenced to prison. He told her that he was deeply sorry and asked her to wait for him to be free once more. She wept and told him that she was pregnant with his child. She did not promise to wait but she did speak of her love. Benjamin was sentenced to seven years, and the prisons in his day were cold and lonely places. The conditions were harsh and the men who worked as guards were mostly cruel and evil men. He was in a cell and he was not allowed to go outside. There were no libraries and rooms for entertainment. He spent seven years in one cell. He had a bed, a chamber pot, a wooden stool and a Bible. Nothing else was permitted. He was brought food and water three times each day. He ate with his hands for no implements were allowed. This was his life for seven years, but in that time he read our word each day, and he thought of his wife and child and he learned the power of a longing heart.

 

‘Great Lord in heaven, I bow before you and your beloved Son this day as I do often each day. I have been here many days and have many more before I shall be free. I am thankful unto you for your blessings and I pray blessings upon my wife and daughter and my family. We are allowed no communication with others, but in my heart I know that I have a daughter. She is the longing of my heart and I greatly desire to see her when I leave his place. Rachael and I both like the name Amy, so it is my hope that this is the name chosen. My time in prayer or reading your word aloud is the only sound I can clearly hear. I, on occasion, hear the others here and at times the guards will speak. I hear about the deaths of other prisoners, but I feel my guards speak of this to encourage me to take my life as well. Each cell has one large window but it is up high and requires a stool to stand upon. Many have used the stool and the straps upon the bed to hang themselves. I use mine to sit upon, and to gaze outside. I love seeing the sun and clouds by day and the moon and stars at night. I love to hear the rain and see it fall. From my window all I can see is a field and the trees, but in the distance I can see smoke from the village. On rare occasions I see people pass by this place. My window and my stool are a great blessing unto me.

 

Each prisoner is also given a Bible to help with our purification, and mine is my greatest treasure. I have read it many times, and I praise you for your book of love and for the love of your Son. I was lost when I came unto this place and your word went unopened by my hands. In those early months I was almost mad with boredom. I know the number of bricks upon my floor and the number of stones upon each wall. I know the number of links of the chains that hold my bed unto the wall and I have counted the number of steps I can make in a day. I was going mad, and one day I realized that I had a book to read. Your word has saved me. I sit and I speak unto you often or bow as I now do. You are my God, but you have also become a friend unto me. I also spend hours thinking about my wife and my little girl. I long to see her face and to touch her soft skin; I long to hear her voice and to hear her speak words unto me. I want to hear her laughter my God, and I want to hold her in my arms. I long to see her, and I long for my dear wife. She is a precious jewel that I took for granted; please allow me to show her my love for the rest of our days together. I repent of all my sins and I desire and I long to be ever close unto you. Once I leave this place I shall hasten to be baptized so that I may be clean to receive your spirit.

 

I praise you for the birds that come to perch upon my windowsill each day. They are friends unto me and bring me great joy. I love you Great God and I long to be your servant. I shall live each day in a way that I pray is pleasing unto you. Please have mercy and deliver me from this place. Thank you for my window and my stool for without my stool the sky would be all I could see. With my stool I can see the seasons pass and I can behold the beauty of your creation. I long to walk in the fields and valleys and to sit beside a quiet stream. So many things become great blessings when all is removed. I long for my Amy and for my Rachael. I have no paper and nothing to write with but in my time here I have written many poems and songs of praise. I repeat them until they are as the bricks upon the floor. I know every word as I know the bricks and stones of my prison. I desire to recite a poem unto you my God and unto you my Savior. It is one I speak often and I pray that my words bring glory unto you.

 

My Longing Heart

 

There was darkness deep within me, I was lost and without hope,

Deep within I knew my life was without joy, but I walked the known path.

Redemption came unto me, in this prison, within these walls, I was set free,

Freedom from the darkness, freedom and peace within my longing heart.

 

I long for the face of my beloved wife, I yearn for her touch, I desire her laughter,

Laughter shall come unto my longing heart; joy shall visit me some sweet day.

Tears fall upon the stones of this prison, tears flow forth from my longing heart,

I yearn for one not seen of me, for one I have never met or heard.

 

There is a voice I long to hear, it will be more precious than any voice,

I long to hear my little girl speak words unto me, I yearn and I long.

My longing heart seeks to walk in green valleys and to be truly free,

Freedom has come for I found the love of God, for him I do long.

 

My heart speaks dear God, it is a quiet and calm voice deep within,

My heart cries, my heart yearns and my heart has a great desire.

I long to hear a voice never heard, to see a face never seen,

To feel an embrace never known and to touch a hand that loves.

 

My heart longs for my wife and daughter, but I have come to see,

My longing heart is for you as well my God and my King, I long.

I long to hear you speak my name, I long to feel your embrace, I long,

To see your face, to hear your voice, to touch your face, my heart longs.

 

My longing heart is yours my God; I give you all that I am,

I give you my heart and I give you my hopes, my dreams, my breath.

 

 

My longing heart yearns for the God that has given me freedom in prison,

Set me free my God; let me live so that I may live for you, my heart longs.

 

Please hear my prayer my Lord. I yearn and I long for my wife and my little girl, but in this place I have found you and deep within I know that you and you alone can fill my longing heart.’

 

There is power in the longing heart my people. I offer you freedom from the prisons that hold you captive. Yearn to hear my voice, long to stand upon the Crystal Sea, long to see my face and to feel loves’ embrace. There is a yearning within that I long to fill. Come and be mine for my heart longs to rescue and to save and to fill your life with my love and my light. Know the power of the longing heart.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

 

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